Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Meerkat Sentry Denies Napping on Duty, Blames Very Bright Sun
For roughly forty seconds on Tuesday afternoon, the mob's lookout post was occupied by a meerkat whose eyes were closed, and the mob would like to know why.
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Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Bowerbird Rejects Bottle Cap for Being the Wrong Blue
The cap was round, clean and undeniably blue, and after four minutes of silent inspection the bowerbird carried it back out of the garden and dropped it by the shed.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Hermit Crabs Form Orderly Queue as Roomy Shell Comes on the Market
One roomy whelk shell turned up at low tide, and by the afternoon eleven hermit crabs had lined up by size and moved house in under a minute.
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Goodbye Extender
A telescopic hallway that grows a little longer every time someone says right, we really should be going, and then does not go.
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Shoelace Referee
A clip-on whistle that shows you a yellow card for a loose shoelace, which sounds pointless until you meet the one person who truly needs it.
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Car Horn That Says Sorry
A hobbyist decided the loudest button in the car should also be able to apologise, so he gave the horn a second, much smaller voice.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Ants Complete Bridge Three Days Ahead of Schedule
The crossing was built out of the workforce itself, opened to traffic before it was finished, and will be dismantled by walking away.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Sheep Issue Statement on Being Counted
The flock has confirmed it is aware of the practice, considers the figures broadly accurate, and would like the jumping to stop.
Fiction Useless Inventions
The Museum Rope for the Home
Two brass posts and a length of burgundy velvet rope, for cordoning off the one corner of your house that is currently tidy.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Penguins Announce Standing Rota
Under the new arrangement, everybody takes a turn on the outside of the huddle, and nobody is to mention how long anyone else has been in the middle.