Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Owl Insists It Is Not Grumpy, It Simply Cannot Move Its Eyes
A tawny owl in the old oak by the playing field has asked the neighbourhood to stop reading so much into her stare, which she says is just how her face works.
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Fact-based Weird Facts
Chameleons Change Colour to Send Messages, Not Just to Hide
A chameleon is not a living copy machine for whatever it sits on: its most dazzling colour changes are messages to other chameleons, made with tiny crystals in its skin.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Puffins Deny Colour-Coordinating Their Beaks for the Summer Season
Spokesbirds for a clifftop colony insist the bright orange beaks that appear every spring are entirely natural and have nothing whatsoever to do with fashion.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Woodpecker Insists the Knocking Is Just Checking Whether Anyone Is In
For eleven mornings a woodpecker has hammered on the metal chimney cap of number four at ten past six, and he would like it understood that he is being polite, not loud.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Raccoon Insists the Dunking Is Quality Control, Not Laundry
Every scrap of bread, three grapes and one entire boiled potato went into the stream before being eaten, and the raccoon responsible would like it recorded as inspection rather than laundry.
Fiction Tiny Stories
The Man Who Swept the Empty Lido
The outdoor pool on Harbour Road closes every October, and every winter morning since, one retired swimmer has let himself in to sweep it for a summer that is months away.
Fact-based Weird Facts
Hippos Make Their Own Sunscreen
A hippo climbing out of a river shines orange-red in the sun, and that glossy coat is a sunscreen it makes in its own skin, one that keeps germs away as well.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Magpie Denies Interest in Shiny Things, Calls It an Old Rumour
A statement delivered at length from a fence post asks the public to stop leaving teaspoons out, and requests one very specific kind of bendy twig instead.
Fact-based Weird Facts
Goldfish Do Not Have a Three-Second Memory
The famously forgetful goldfish can remember things for months, learn to press a lever for food, work out what time dinner is served and tell its owner apart from other people.
Fiction Animal News — Fiction
Hummingbird Declares Garden Feeder His Personal Property
A hummingbird the weight of a coin has claimed exclusive rights to a sugar-water feeder with four perfectly good drinking holes, and spends most of his day making sure nobody else uses any of them.